How a child can HATE their Parents

  LOVING AND HATING, SEE 887F
  ●      A Hating in general
  LACK OF LOVE, SEE 887E
    ▼      A1 About hatred
  There is a time to hate (Eccles. 3:8); hatred stirs up strife (Prov. 10:12); he who hates disguises it with his lips (Prov. 26:24); though his hatred be covered with guile (Prov. 26:26); those who hate you will rule over you (Lev. 26:17).
    ▼      A2 Causes of hatred
  He who spares the rod hates his son (Prov. 13:24); a man of evil devices is hated (Prov. 14:17); the poor is hated even by his neighbour (Prov. 14:20); the nations will abhor him who tells the wicked they are righteous (Prov. 24:24); let your foot be seldom in your neighbour’s house lest he hate you (Prov. 25:17); in the house of Israel I have seen a horrible thing (Hos. 6:10); they became detestable like the thing they loved (Hos. 9:10).
  ●      B God hating
    ▼      B1 God hating people
  Because of these customs God abhorred them (Lev. 20:23); I will loathe you (Lev. 26:30); you hate all workers of iniquity (Ps. 5:5); the Lord abhors men of bloodshed and deceit (Ps. 5:6); whoever does these things is detestable to the Lord (Deut. 18:12); the Lord detests those who wear clothing of the opposite sex (Deut. 22:5); the Lord hates him that loves violence (Ps. 11:5); Jacob I loved but Esau I hated (Mal. 1:2–3; Rom. 9:13); because God hates us he brought us out of Egypt (Deut. 1:27); because God hates them he has brought them to kill them in the wilderness (Deut. 9:28); my inheritance roared against me, so I hate her (Jer. 12:8); God abhorred his heritage (Ps. 106:40); at Gilgal I began to hate them (Hos. 9:15); have you loathed Zion? (Jer. 14:19).
    ▼      B2 God hating things
  Six or seven things which the Lord hates (Prov. 6:16–19); the Lord hates a false balance (Prov. 11:1); you hate the deeds of the Nicolaitans, which I also hate (Rev. 2:6); the Lord hates sacred pillars (Deut. 16:22); the Lord detests the earnings of prostitutes (Deut. 23:18); the Lord detests different weights and measures (Deut. 25:16); unclean animals are detestable (Lev. 11:10; Lev. 11:11; Lev. 11:12; Lev. 11:20; Lev. 11:23; Lev. 11:41–3); sacrificing blemished animals is detestable to the Lord (Deut. 17:1); I hate your feasts and offerings (Isa. 1:13–14); the nations do every abominable thing which the Lord hates in serving their gods (Deut. 12:31); I hate the pride of Jacob (Amos 6:8); I hate false oaths (Zech. 8:17); I hate your festivals (Amos 5:21); I hate divorce and covering one’s garment with violence (Mal. 2:16).


Day, C. A. (2009). Collins Thesaurus of the Bible. Bellingham, WA: Logos Bible Software.


This morning I was looking up some biblical references for hatred and I found some interesting information. As I have been having many conversations of late with friends and family, both male and female about how they were setting up her sons (Sons in general) to HATE them later on in life. How? Why it’s simple, by not allowing him to experience and reap the consequences of bad actions as a child. I explained to them that the hatred will come after frustration, stemming from his or her inability to navigate the channels of life effectively on their own.

My own children are not perfect, and that’s because their parents weren’t, and still aren’t perfect. To my wife’s and my dismay, our children are not where we would like for them to be, but this is parenting 101 and parents dreams always outshine true ability. But they are fully self-sufficient adults and have been out of the home since graduating high school. The reason for this miracle is several things. A God-Led household, love and examples of love, a house full of fun, and a strict adherence to responsibilities and truths. How we told our children one should live is HOW my wife and I lived. At the age of five they were taught before coming down to breakfast to be dressed and have their beds made up and rooms cleaned. Chores, learning, and life lessons were a shared household event steeped in fun. If something was missed or not done, their weekly allowance reflected it. As a result, they developed a healthy competition to make sure neither of them were caught short of the other. In this way my wife and I fashioned our children’s’ psyche in the form of their future roles for a healthy work ethic. In other words, their responsibilities in school and home mirrored what their adult work ethic would look like. When they became adults getting a job and keeping one was not a NEW dynamic for them.

I have said, through experience, and not just hearsay, that it is hard for most Single Mothers to raise boys into men. What is missed by most women is the fact that in order to become MEN, boys must learn DIRECTLY the consequences of their actions, both bad and good. Boys CANNOT just be told about what to do as girls can, boys have to experience it, it’s just how we are wired. This teaches them to become reliable men, fathers, and husbands later in life.

As Dr. Steve Perry asserts, “Mommas Boys become Absentee Fathers.”

Single mothers both say and understand that they must be both Father and Mother to their children, but I have found that they RARELY know what this entails, and rightfully so.

Iyanla Vanzant in my opinion represents the embodiment of the single most important living person on the planet as it relates to “the whole woman”. Little Susie never imagines that she is to one day become a Single Mother, yet, today’s trends shows that to be her fate even if she starts out being married. Why? Because the man she chooses to marry will have a 77-80% in the likelihood to have been raised by a single Mother, or in a Mother-Dominated household, in which he had no idea how to handle adversity. As much of a joy Motherhood is to our human-dynamic here in the United States, if a woman must bear the life of that birth and child alone, it can be the single most detrimental event of her adult life.

So in dealing with their sons, rather than the Single mother doing as she says she understands, by being taking on the hard fatherly-role when the time calls for it, easier by far to be the nurturing mother and assuage her sons cry for help, rather than be dad and force him to live up to the consequences of his actions. You see a young man who only gets a cell phone, video games, candy, play time, ect. only after he has met his household and scholarly obligations first, learns that life is GIVE and TAKE. He learns that for everything he gets THERE IS A PRICE. A father can let his sons cry for the extra serving of desert when all the vegetables have not been eaten go unheeded, most mothers cannot. These vital life lessons create responsible men who understand RESPONSIBILITY.

This is important as it teaches the most important lesson of all, that men don’t always get everything they want, AND THAT’S ALRIGHT!

A boy that is saved from every hurt and ill of the world will grow up in most instances to be a father who abandons his responsibilities and his children when the going gets rough. He has learned to flee, call for Mom or abandon hope when life gets hard, and even leave his own child and its mother when life gets rough. When a child learns to shoulder the consequences of their actions early on, the experiences force them to make better decisions BEFORE acting upon them.

Another thing is that these lessons must come when the child is a CHILD, not an adolescent, or after you found a mate who forces you to use tough love, or you have grown tired of coddling them. Its far too late by then and they will rightfully HATE you for abandoning them. Don’t think so? Ever watch Dominick Dunne's Power, Privilege, and Justice? You wouldn’t believe how many children murder or try to murder their parents after they were forced to be self-reliant too late in life.

So, if you are a parent who wonders why your children keep making BAD decisions when they seem far too old to be making them, think back to how many times they have been saved from their own learning experiences.

Again I say from experiences that have touched me through my life and life’s work. You will not always be able to give your children everything they want. And if you think they will not hate you when you can’t, think again.